Clarkson’s Farm Returns May 3 - What We Know, Who We’ve Met & What’s Coming Up

The unlikely wholesome hit that started way back in the original Covid lockdown is back for a third series.

Jeremy Clarkson is well known for his epic stint on Top Gear but is now best known for Clarkson’s Farm, which follows his attempts at becoming a profitable farmer. The funny and heartwarming show has followed the highs and the lows of 1000-acre Diddly Squat Farm and has shone a light on the difficulties and heartbreak that farmers face every year.

So here’s a recap on the last two series, who we’ve met along the way, and what we can expect from the highly anticipated return on May 3…

Seasons one & two catch up 

The first two seasons introduced us to Jeremy Clarkson’s farm in the Cotswolds, a beautiful and traditional area of the United Kingdom. A beauty that Clarkson’s Chadlington neighbours go on the warpath for, which becomes a running theme throughout.

We saw Clarkson take advice from more experienced staff and ignore it before conceding they were actually right - just look at the size of his Lamborghini tractor for one!

With Kaleb and Charlie by his side, Clarkson manages to sow and reap a variety of crops including wheat, potatoes, and chilies. He also begins to understand the constraints on farmers with the endless paperwork, Brexit subsidy fallout, and red tape in place that Charlie keeps letting him know about, like a little checkered shirt-wearing devil on his shoulder.

Livestock have also made their appearance in the last two seasons, which have provided some of the funniest and most aww moments of the show. We had bees and their precious nectar, ‘Bee Juice', disobedient cows, chickens with fancy coops, and beautiful pronking lambs, which turned one of the barns into a sheep maternity ward and Clarkson into a midwife with help from local experts.

A wise choice was made when they decided to build a farm shop to sell their produce including those vast amounts of potatoes, Bee Juice, and other products. But they didn't account for how popular the shop would be, creating havoc on the peaceful country roads around the farm, and being the first thing to ignite the ire of the Chadlington neighbours.

Further run-ins with the neighbours and strongly worded Parish Council meetings ensued over not only the busy roads but also the fact that they tried to open a restaurant on the farm. This fight will no doubt continue.

Who's who?

So who are the other people in the show that keep Clarkson on the straight and narrow alongside the teams of vets and experts?

First up is Lisa Hogan, Clarkson's beautiful, clever, and straight-talking Irish girlfriend. She’s the brains behind the delicious looking farm shop, who’s not afraid to get her Wellington boots muddy.

We also have Charlie Ireland AKA Cheerful Charlie. Charlie is Clarkson’s land agent, who has provided a wealth of crop and financial advice, with a hefty dose of reality regarding the rules. You will more often than not see him pulling some exasperated faces while he’s finding ways for Clarkson to fight the local Parish Council.

Next up is Kaleb Cooper, or the Fetus as Clarkson names him. Young Kaleb is a passionate farmer who knows his way around a tractor and isn’t afraid to tell Clarkson he’s being an idiot. Also known for his hairstyles.

Last and most certainly not least is drywall and construction expert Gerald Cooper. The mullet-bearing legend can be seen popping up here and there lending a hand with the harvest, rebuilding walls, and giving unintelligible anecdotes. Likes a beer.

Image of Gerald courtesy of IMDB

What’s in store in the new season?

Thanks to the trailer, season three looks set to be as eventful as ever with drama around the restaurant continuing, the risk of flooding, Kaleb and Clarkson having a profit-making competition, blackberry vacuuming, an appearance by the Prime Minister, and the introduction of pigs.

Although the porcine saga will require tear-mopping tissues at some points - you have been warned.

Get ready to watch

Despite the challenges of the pandemic, angry parish council, and Clarkson’s best efforts, his first couple of years of agriculture were successful and provided some wholesome and witty TV viewing. 

It also introduced us to a brilliant cast of people that make Diddly Squat Farm function one way or another while making their way into our hearts - we’re looking at you, Gerald!

Bring on season three, which returns to Amazon Prime on May 3!